Posts Tagged ‘overwhelm’

The Yahoo! Search Team (Photo by Yahoo Anecdotal)

How do you organize a team? Or stay organized yourself within a team? Everyone has such different styles and modes of communication. Keeping on track and productive can be an organizational tangle. There are a lot of tools today that are supposed to help…email, file-sharing, prayer circles…but do they actually work or add to workload by virtue of the amount of information to keep track of?

I think it depends on the leadership. When the leadership is clear on goals and shares information with the team,  everyone understands the key pieces of the puzzle/initiative at hand. Then people can act with authority within their own sphere…using the tools at their disposal creatively and productively.  Inspired, directed leaders =  focused, organized team.

I think the issue of disorganization can make a 2 year-old of the most reasonable of adults. I’ve seen it many a time. We get what I call the “I don’t wanna”s. I don’t wanna go through my thousands of email. I don’t wanna go through my mail, my inbox, my voice mail etc. You know the song and you probably know the dance.

I may not have a full-proof solution, magic bullet to this problem. I do have a suggestion though. It’s called, “being reasonable.” Every now and then we just have to be a bit more reasonable about the situation we are facing. Yes, there are some productivity tools out there that can help. Some fancy, some old-school techniques too. What beats them all out every time is being reasonable. Moving an inch or two in the direction of what you know will work.

Because you do know. You may not wanna. But you know.

Two teddy bears rescued from the trash (by an adult). Photo by Nina Toessinger

I was working with a new client today who has twins. I wonder why she needs an organizer? Ha! Her girls are 7 and when we started in on their room they were excited to help. The thing that I found remarkable was that it was so easy for them to decide what to keep and what to get rid of.  Actually, this is not unusual. (Though my client assured me it is not always that easy!)  My clients who have kids find that their kids have no problem letting go when it is time. They immediately knew which teddy bear they loved, which pair of pajamas, which dress…and which ones they were over. There was very little deliberation.  Sure there are those few tattered stuffed animals they cling to and that is ok. I’m not at war with sentimentality. But they are very clear about those things that are dear to them, there are few – and the clutter at large that can go.

When do we lose the ability to make decisions in the moment? Even when it came to the idea of gifts: “Uncle Dave gave that ballerina bunny to us – but I hate it – it goes.” They understood that their room was theirs and if they didn’t like something then they didn’t have to keep it. I would love to hear your feedback on this. Do you know when you started having trouble making decisions about what stays and what goes? When the clutter started to pile up in your life? What makes it hard to make those decision?

Maybe it is because I’m on this cleanse but I started to think that getting behind on paperwork and other tasks that make up an organized life is like getting behind on digestion. We get backed up. Don’t worry, I’m not going to get too graphic here. But, I will say that the bloated, constipated feeling that people with bad digestion have is not entirely different from that bloated and overwhelmed feeling disorganized people have. Getting backed up is uncomfortable. No matter where it is happening. Good news is there are solutions to poor digestion and clutter. Good habits are usually at the root of both.

Powerful words

When someone says you’re not alone suddenly anything is possible. I think the most daunting thing about getting most organizing tasks started is that feeling of being alone. I hear many of my clients say this – that the overwhelm comes from feeling alone with a project and not even knowing where to start in order to solve it.

Can the mind that created the problem also solve it?

Some say the mind that created the problem can’t solve it. I don’t know if it is true but what I do know is that bringing in outside resources has always been a relief and a great help.  Not that you/we don’t know how to do these things we get stuck on. I know how to run but I’m not going to do it unless I have a trainer running with me! (Or I’m being chased.)

A trainer is also – well – trained. I also have resources and years of know-how. But a lot of the magic in the mix is that people feel they have a partner in the process when they bring me or other pros in to work with them on whatever is at hand.  This is no little thing either. I say magic purposefully.

Suddenly the piles and the clutter don’t seem quite so menacing. Organization is a place that doesn’t seem so far away. The scene is set for success. They start to have my eyes. Because I see it all done, how it can be, the potential. Ahh. This is the beauty of partnership.

Hi, I’m Jennifer Palais, I’m a professional organizer and I’m here to get you and your office in shape for the summer. It’s almost June so its time! I have three tips today to get you started. They are very easy and this is all in preparation for you to go paperless. Because I believe that is the easiest and the most slimming way to go. So the first thing to do to get started is to get an external drive. And I like Iomega, you can Google that or you can go to amazon.com you can use it for a PC or a Mac but there are many others. You don’t have to go anywhere, you can just go online and order one and back up all of your computers that way. The second thing you want to do, and this is do be redundant, to get a back up of your backup, is to do an offsite back up and I like mozy.com for that – its very inexpensive just about $5 a month or so and that way you can get an offsite back up in case of an emergency in case of a natural disaster, we don’t like to talk about that we hope it doesn’t happen but just in case you will have that peace of mind in case you even just lose your external drive. All of this we try and keep very reasonably priced. The external drive, the first thing I talked about about $100-$250 depending on how much information you have or if you are talking about a home office or a business office, mozy.com which is your offsite back up that’s the second thing I talked about is about 5-6 a month. Now the third thing I’m talking about is to keep the essential paper materials that sometimes you have to keep. We’re going to try to go entirely paperless. But there are a few items we will talk about in the next installment that you will have to keep and we will want a fireproof save for those – that’s the third thing I’m talking about today that you will need to get. And that’s anywhere from $50-$100. Depending on how many items you will need. That’s again in case of some sort of disaster you will want to that peace of mind to know that you have a place for those few items. So three things we want an external drive, we want offsite back and we want a fireproof safe. And that will get you started for trimming your office down for the summer we’re going to get you and your office in shape are you with me? I hope so! I’ll see you for the next installment! Bye everybody!

Loneliness …

Henner's Solitude

Cures What Ails You?

“The best cure for loneliness is solitude.” – Marianne Morre

I think about this quote and I think that the thing we (we who?) are most missing is something on the inside.

What holds us up?

It seems we are internally underdeveloped and externally overdeveloped: cluttered, distracted. The show Hoarders has captured the nation’s attention in such an uncanny way. Why? Is there something to wanting so much stuff around us? Is it  meant to bolster us up?  If it is all gone do we just fall apart?

Clutter, hoarding and mood

Of course hoarders is an extreme but there is a continuum.  Now don’t get me wrong. I love my stuff. I love my iPhone, and MacBook Air, and all the applications that whirl and buzz within.

I also think if all this stuff isn’t balanced out with a little old fashioned space (aka peace and quiet), or even loneliness and boredom, a lot of different kinds of build up can happen. I can see it in my temperament (irritation) and I see it in client’s homes (clutter). You may have the space to put something but still not ever make the time to do so.

Sometimes a banana is just …clutter.

I think there is usually something behind disorganization. And it doesn’t have to be pathological or neurotic. Usually it has to do with being willing to slow down or let go. It usually has to do with being willing to let go of some of the distractions in favor of some solitude.  It is about spending some time with yourself and the choices you’ve been making.

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My clients always want to know what my apartment looks like. Prospective clients too. Most people I meet actually, once they find out what I do. A follow up question is, “Are you organized? What does your place look like?” I think people want to catch me with my junk drawers down. My place is a mess on occasion and I am completely fine with it. Mess being a different issue from dirty…which I’m not so fine with. (Mess = stuff everywhere,  dirty = um… dirty, dust, dirt,

sticky, dust-bunny-madness-running-the-all-star-dirt-show… right?)

I have a small apartment in Venice and if I don’t put my jacket away the place is a mess.  In a small place if you are not on top of every one of your items it doesn’t take much for the place to look frumpy. Having said that about 50% of the time I just don’t care. I will walk in the door with bags on every arm. Drop them, head for the couch with the takeou

Venice Beach, Sketch Image by roberthuffstutter via Flickr

t, watch 6 hours of Mad Men and go straight to bed.  Nothing and I mean nothing, gets put away. (Shocking – I know, but I like to live on the edge.) But those last two words are the key to it all for me and for what I work with clients on. Put away. There is a place for it all to go when motivation strikes and I feel like putting it all away. That is the key to organization – having a place for everything…and trusting yourself to eventually put the thing in the place it lives in.  There is sanity in letting it live both in and out of its place.

and it is still not over.

This post makes me feel very self-involved and unorganized although I’ve had friends (who will remain nameless) who have had very mess birthdays spilling all over the whole month. Dates typically are organized. April 18th. It is contained. It is a day consisting of 24 hours, each hour consisting of 60 minutes and then it is over. Your birthday. Done. Completed. In one day. I guess this is just the birthday hangover. I didn’t drink and I didn’t even really eat and yet I’m emotionally hung over. I’m 38 and I keep saying it – I’ve said it so many times in the hope that the saying of it will make it somehow lessen the sting.

I’m just letting you all know that this tactic is not working.

Image via Wikipedia

I got in my annual birthday car accident and that didn’t really do much for me. That was an accident…but still. Tradition is tradition. Being organized – although I recommend it over the alternative – not much help either. I went to yoga, wrote, talked on the phone, walked, watched movies, did errands,  and slept. None moved me from my funk.

I found being in acceptance that I’m thoroughly and profoundly unhappy about this birthday and most everything right now is the only thing helping me get over me. And I already volunteer so this funk has been beyond even helping others. The true solution I found is luxuriating in my unhappiness. Shocking I know. This is so unpopular in these days of the Secret. Everyone will tell you to focus on what you want and it is yours. They will tell you that what you focus on grows. They will tell you to think happy thoughts. Well, I am experiencing another kind of secret. That feeling your feelings allows them to pass. That letting yourself feel exactly what it is you are feeling in this moment – is the thing that allows it to pass. Even if it that feeling is ugly and unhappy the more fully you embrace it and feel it the more quickly it passes and the stronger you feel as a result. That, is the only secret you’ll ever need to know. And I just learned it – at the ripe, old age of 38. 38. 38.

I hear a lot about being present and I never ever get it. I always think that I do and then the idea slips out of my fingers … slippery, very slippery. Then I get so annoyed with the whole thing. I keep hearing about all of the Law of Attraction ideas – most relating to being in the moment (in order to get the Ferrari you want – oh and the mansion. Sorry to be snarky I’m just that way sometimes.). I’m supposed to be smart, I’m also supposed to understand productivity and time-management and still – these ideas remain a lot of ethereal, sublime bull to me so much of the time. Grrr!!

What is it that I cannot seem to grasp? Oh – this is so, so me. Trying way to hard. Thinking that it is about being smart and about being a certain something that other people have and I don’t. That in ten thousand more hours at my job I’ll know it. This leads in (somehow) to this crazy and insane fight I’ve been having with myself about getting up in the morning to exercise. Now – I usually do get to it at some point in the day to some degree but I’ve decided that smart and successful people do this task in the morning. Also, I just am happier and more sane when I do it in the morning. The back and forth of  “well, I’ll go to the gym at noon, no … how about the 6pm class” and on and on and on is just moot if I exercise at 6am. So… the other kind of argument starts at 6am.

Me: Get. Up. Now.

The other me:  No.

Me: Yes.

The other me: No.

Both of me: Oy.

Today I got to this place of – what is so bad about just putting your feet on the floor? How does that really feel in this moment? How are you feeling right now with your feet walking into the kitchen? And that was that. Because the answer was…I feel really great right now. Exercise began and there was no argument because I wasn’t in the future of how I thought exercise would feel. I was in the exact moment of now. I think maybe I got it. Almost afraid to say. Ha!